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Alright, I admit it. Sometimes when I wave my hands in the air, I actually do care.
Marriage. When dating goes too far.
I drank an energy drink so if anyone needs help packing, pushing your car to a gas station or shaking the leaves off a tree
Thanks for explaining the word "many" to me, it means a lot.
It only takes one slow walking person in the grocery store to destoroy the illusion that I am a nice person.
I can`t decide what`s more embarrassing - the fact that I still live out of a suitcase, or that I`m a professional ventriloquist dummy.
Always check the height of nearby ceiling fans before giving a toddler a ride on your shoulders... * How I learned this rule is not important.
I have a fear of speed bumps, but I`m slowly getting over it.
You know you`re desperate for an answer when you look on the second page of Google.
You know its going to be a b!tch of a day when you put your bra on backwards and it fits better.
I`m ready to regret having sex with you.
I would offer moral support ... But my morals are questionable.
Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it`s up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with!!
Nobody wished me a happy birthday today, which isn´t surprising really, since it isn´t my birthday.
The real fountain of youth is to have a dirty mind and a naughty smile.