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I don’t have bumper stickers because I don’t believe in anything strongly enough to potentially get my car keyed.
Things I didn`t learn in high school... how to pay bills buy a house apply for college but thank goodness I can graph a polynomial function.
I really like it when women check me out, they seem to be able to work the register a lot better than men.
The male version of a tramp stamp should be called a douche tag.
they say there`s love in every corner....gosh I think I`m moving in circles
Raising teenagers is easy, they sleep 16 hours day, eat the other 8, and the only word in their vocab is "ok"
A lie is just a great story that someone ruined by telling the truth.
I made a huge TO DO list for this weekend. I just can`t figure out who`s going to do it.
Walmart: Because where else in the world can you pay $50 to have your oil changed by someone with a GED, find a sized 46H bra, or run the risk of being filmed live on location with the men and women of law enforcement on your way out the door.
If you`re going to give me dirty looks for being at the liquor store at 10am, don`t be open.
I always find the "easy-open tab" right after I finally manage to tear the package open with my teeth.
I can think of other ways to eat fresh, but I`ll settle for this subway sandwich.
Just scraped 3 inches of "Mostly Cloudy" off my car.
There are two types of people in this world, those with common sense and those who have to pee on the electric fence for themselves
Facebook is great, but I still miss the good old days of writing down my random thoughts and sliding them into stranger`s pockets.