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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I just watched a puppy do something really cute. It was like a real life YouTube video.
I want a doorbell that makes the sound of someone knocking on the door.
Why do crutons come in resealable bags? Are we really worried about them going stale?
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
Trust me when I say anyone can dance! - Jack Daniels
Home is where you can say anything you want, because nobody listens to you anyway.
I am losing Facebook friends at an alarming rate. Whatever it is that I said, is working like a charm.
should probably get my daily dose of calcium.. white russians it is
I never met a teenager driving a luxury car that I didn’t hate.
Please no one tell me what happens on the NFL today; I`m still on Season 8.
75% of women in open relationships don`t actually know it yet.
To find out your dolphin name, lick your finger tips and rub a balloon
My favorite thing around the holidays is being put into a group message with 200 people reply "Who`s This"
One time I exaggerated so hard that I died.
If other employees are taking four fifteen minutes smoke break a day, I should most certainly be allowed a one hour nap time.