Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I hear Internet Explorer 10 is going to allow you to download and install Firefox up to three times faster.
I got kicked out of the pool today ... apperently the breaststroke isn`t what I thought it was.
The hardest part of the job interview is knowing the best moment to lean in for the kiss.
It’s not that I’m old, your music really does suck.
Telling my kids that the Titanic sunk because Jack and Rose had sex before marriage
I had a terrible dream about mufflers and now I`m exhausted.
Thought cartoons were getting better. Turns out it was a news story about Justin Bieber.
If the conversation gets too serious and uncomfortable, take your pants off.
Any hedge can be a maze if you are drunk enough.
Okay, I can`t take it anymore. What in the hell holds the blocks up in Mario Brothers?
Punctuality is a waste of time since no one is ever there to appreciate it.
Just think of how different the world would be if Noah had eaten those two chickens.
Quick question, ladies: If you shave your eyebrows off and then draw them back on, what the hell are you doing?
Any of you had a friend that borrowed your sh!t and kept it for so long you had to borrow it back..
Be safety conscious. 80% of people are caused by accidents.