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Every time i see a person kneeling over tying their shoe, i run up behind them and hop over them to try and get a game of leapfrog going.
Sleep is like sex, you never get enough of it and sometimes it feels like it never happened at all.
Every Scooby-Doo episode would literally be two minutes long if the gang went to the mask store first and asked a few questions.
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That’s almost $21.00 in dog money.
Another day....another 0.2% of a dollar
Why can`t Mosquitos suck Fat instead of Blood!
In case I drink too much and pass out for a while, Happy New Year you guys.
I bet if there were little basketball hoops above every garbage can, littering would greatly decrease.
What doesn`t kill you, makes you stronger... except for lions, lions will definitely kill you.
Remember before we met? I miss those days.
It takes patience to listen.., it takes skill to pretend you’re listening.
*Hears a joke about a chocolate bar* *Snickers*
That moment when you spell a word so wrong that even auto correct is like....`I`ve got nothing man.`
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.
If nobody comes from the future to stop you, how bad can the decision really be?