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A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
You guys can laugh at my cargo pants all you want, but I just walked out of Taco Bell with 350 sauce packets.
I try to explain to my kids during the movie that in reality, even a cowardly lion would eat a girl and a little dog.
Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot them?
Happy Labor Day to someone who barely labored this year.
I`ll bet other dogs must think that poodles belong to some weird religious cult.
Its O.K. to laugh during sex … just don’t point ! ... trust me
I havend`t heard from DAEMON MAILER in years, I hope he`s okay.
If the shoe fits, wear it. Unless they`re not yours. But you can still were them. It`s just a road test, after all.
Tip of the day: When the cop asks you if you had anything to drink in the last 24 hours, do NOT ask them for the time... trust me
Whoever invented the 5 day work week and 2 day weekend can suck my a**!
I once bought shoes in China that said "made around the corner"
Pretty soon you`ll be able to get married online, instead of saying "I do" you will have to click "I agree to these terms and conditions."
69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.
When I see a shoe on the side of the road I wonder if Cinderella is in a nearby house.