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They say in the near future computers will become more intelligent than people, really, the near future? I walk down the street and see girls who struggle with the difference between orange and tanned, guys who have no idea how a belt works, and all of them with less language skills then the average trained chimp. Computers? Hell Iβve got an alarm clock thatβs smarter than most of them right now.
Remember theyβre just as afraid of seeing you dance as you are of dancing.
Β¦Itβs time to clean the refrigerator when something closes the door from the inside.
I fold my laundry just like everyone else. About 3 weeks after the dryer buzzes.
Remember, Youβre only young once, but you can be immature forever.
why are the foods you want eat late at night in loud crackling wrappers?
One time I asked some girl what she was thinking. By the time she finished her thought we had 2 children.
I remember 2011 like it was yesterday. ;)
How can Wal-mart have a bazillion carts and everyone with at least one wobbly wheel?
Anyone know where I can get a waterproof recliner for my shower?
I just bought an answering machine! What should I ask it?
If a cannibal is late for dinner, do they give him the cold shoulder?
My favorite part of seeing someone I know in public is pretending I didnβt.
So apparently I`ve been Googling `Asian Prom` this whole time. I watched like seven videos before I realized they weren`t going to bang.
I think a clear conscience is really just memory loss.