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Cauliflower is just broccoli ghosts.
People say, β€œYou have to work on a marriage.” I say, β€œNo thank you. I already have a job
I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it!
Saying "I`m offended" is basically telling the world you can`t control your own emotions so everyone else should do it for you.
keep scrolling… it gets better lol
You know you`re broke when your Bologna Does Not have a first name!
Even if your life was a total waste of space, there’s always hope that you’ll die in a weird enough way to make a CSI episode.
We must STOP the driver of that bus that everyone keeps getting thrown under!
Some of you ladies need to ease up on the makeup until we get this clown situation resolved.
I suggest we drink before we go out drinking.
I have some serious self-esteem issues. The last time I posted a selfie I first cropped myself out of it.
Curling irons have a warning tag that says β€œFor External Use Only.” Which of you sick mofos made that necessary?
Facebook where I am surrounded with people but still no one can see me biting my toe nails or picking my nose :-D
The point of no return sounds like a fun vacation spot.
Lets all take a minute and realize the lack of creativity in the name "fire place"