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For those who do not know what ADHD can do to a person, let me expla.....oooh look i got a text message.
I often worry that mankind is going to start World War III soley because we enjoy trilogies.
A newly wed guy asked me about marriage. I told him it’s sort of like a museum. You have to be quiet and you can’t really touch anything.
Just remember, If we get caught you`re deaf and I don`t speak English.
Breakfast in bed probably means you are dating someone. Dinner in bed means you`re probably single.
Sometimes it would be nice if the world had an off switch.
I don’t know what my neighbor’s name is and we’ve been neighbors too long for me to ask.
I`d like to eat healthy, but we all know what happened that time Eve ate an apple. Best not to risk it.
I grew up living paycheck to paycheck. But through hard work and perseverance, I now live direct deposit to direct deposit.
Sorry I said "at least it`s healthy" when you asked me how cute your baby was.
Sometimes my sarcasm is so intense that even I’m not sure if I’m kidding or not.
This may be the wine talking but help he’s drinking me, he’s drinking me.
People always say that alcohol kills... but if you think about it .... it causes many births too.
I`m the perfect man if you don`t factor in looks, depth of character, emotional availability, intelligence or financial well being.
If you’ve been naughty… go to your room. If you want to be naughty… go to mine.