Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

I`m so hungry I could Instagram a horse.
When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison.
We live in a world in where it is easier to get out of a marriage than a mobile-phone contract
Most people decide to have scramble eggs immediately after thinking: "I`ll just flip this omelette"
I love my car. Without it, I would not be where I am today.
People say there are plenty of fish in the sea, well that is nice and all but I’m human, I don’t date fish.
If you like to make love while listeninag to music, always choose live album. ..That way you`ll get an applause every 3 to 4 minutes. :)
I wish I were an octopus so that the answer to all of my problems would be, `change color and escape in a cloud of ink`
United Airlines.... Board as Doctor, leave as patient.
Isn`t it strange that bankruptcy attorneys don`t let you make payments....
These peopele at the gym are looking at me like they expect me to share my donuts ... SMH
Even when I’m home alone, I still answer Jeopardy questions out loud.
You only live once is the most reassuring thing I`ve ever heard.
Relationships always start out as "You`re smart and funny." and end up as "You think you know everything and it`s all a joke to you!"
Of course you should follow me. I’m funny. Ask anyone. Well, except my mother-in-law. Don`t ask her.