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Do not treat a woman like an object. It hates that...
Netflix doesn’t care if u showered or not
Just googled "who gives a sh!t?" My name wasn`t in the search results.
It’s impressive how quickly I can go from full to starving.
The Internet makes things so convenient. Before it existed, if you wanted to order a DVD online, you had to invent the Internet.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it´s still on the list.
Never trust a married guys opinion of who`s hot. It`s like asking a starving guy what food tastes good.
Never let the printer know that you are in a hurry.
The first snow of spring is always the most beautiful
Roses are Red Violets are Blue, If I had a brick, I`d throw it at you.
Im not fat I´m just easier to see
I feel like doing something productive today. If I sit here long enough, maybe it will go away.
Don’t get me started. I don’t come with brakes.
I`m sorry I slapped you but you didn`t seem like you would ever stop talking and I panicked.
Not sure if I logged into Facebook or the Cartoon Network.