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i hate not being able to correct the typo i just made in my previous statues update......DAMN IT! I JUST DID IT AGAIN!
Every year new words are added onto the dictionary, yet no new positions are added to the karma sutra.
Similarities between BRA and BAR 1. Both have similar letters 2. Both are drinking zones 3. When both opened men go crazy "prove me wrong"
Today I learned not all people are appreciative of vetriloquism. Especially my gynecologist.
Remember, laughter is the best medicine. Unless you have diarrea.
You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent ? That’s why I never take baths...
I am starting to think I will never be old enough to know better.
When cleaning my house: 1% Cleaning 30% Complaining 69% Playing with stuffs that I just found
I wish Monday was a figment of my imagination.
It is amazing how quickly kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, dishwasher, or vacuum cleaner.
Dishes are like boyfriends. My roommate should really stop doing mine
“I’m not washing it, I’m just gonna shove it in a pony.” If you’re a girl, that sentence is actually ok.
Robots can do anything we set their mind to
I try not to limit my madness to March.
I`m honest, so when I say I took a "cat nap" that means that I slept for 18 hours and then pissed on your favorite shirt after I woke up.