Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Easter can be just as much fun as an adult as it was as a child. Just paint and hide beer cans instead of eggs.
There are no bad pictures. That`s just how your face looks sometimes.
I wish I could talk to donkeys so I could be known as the ass whisperer.
You should have been a chicken and just went home.
Do not drink and drive.. because there are people out there who text and drive... and they will hit you and it will be your fault !!
The best part about a vacation to England is that my wife won`t need to adjust her driving.
Some of these Giraffe profile pictures are a vast improvement.
Do you think people in Mexico ever say, "Those jobs keep stealing all our Mexic?ns!"
I act like Pacman at parties. I walk around the room eating everything in site and avoiding everyone.
You heard me right. I said:"Lets agree to disagree." It`s much more polite than:"Whatever, bitch."
I went to the doctor for a check up and he says I`m going to live. But I think he`s wrong and it`s just a matter of time.
Do people with cats not know about dogs?
Every paper towel commercial just reminds me that the cleanest option is to just not have children.
Love your enemies; after all, you made them!
The problem with reality is that there’s no background music, so you never really know whether something mysterious, evil or adventurous is about to happen.