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I have this great midnight snack it`s called, what do I think my roommate won`t notice if I eat the edges off of
I’m what you would call “indoorsy”
My door is always open. So please feel free to leave.
We`re all brave until we realize the cockroach has wings
If your phone doesn´t ring it´s me.
There’s a good reason I’m up this late: because I have to wake up really early.
A person soon learns how little they know when a child begins to ask questions.
The hostess said to sit wherever I want, but the couple at this table are giving each other weird looks and have totally stopped talking.
The secret to happiness is a good sense of humor and a bad memory.
eHarmony has a 24 month plan. How ugly do you have to be to need 2 years to find someone?
According to Pinterest, I`m severely under-utilizing mason jars.
The only hunger games i care about involve plastic hippos.
I made this margarita with my kids` slushie machine ... Don`t judge
I was always a believer in evolution....then I spent an hour at Walmart and now I`m not so sure
It`s time to admit that as a species, we are just not ready for 4-way stops