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Age sure does change your perspective. Lots of things I hated when I was a kid I love now... like having nothing to do, going to bed early, watching the news, spankings.... stuff like that.
I`m running low on funny but I have plenty of sexy left.
There is a big difference between a guy and a girl saying "I went through an entire box of tissues during that movie."
+ if you wish you could record your dreams.
Ever notice that all the instruments searching for intelligent life are pointed away from earth?
If I procrastinated any harder right now, it would have to involve time travel.
You better not pout, you better not cry, you better not shout I`m telling you why...we have our own problems and nobody cares about yours.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did, not screaming for their lives like the passengers in the back of his truck
Don`t judge me for things I did a few seconds ago, I`ve changed since then.
just wanted to tell the weekend that I love you and I will be back, I will not let the weekdays take me away from you.
Be careful on how tough you are on your kids....Strict parents create sneaky children.
"With a stroke of a pen your name can live on forever in a quote!... Unknown,
I keep a second pair of shoes at work, I don`t want people to recognize me when I`m pooping.
Being a woman should count as a pre-existing mental condition.
hell yeah !!!! i was the lucky sperm !!!!!