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If your Facebook post requires me to hit “continue…” get a diary.
I`m surprised carving faces into vegetables after pulling out their innards isn`t incorporated into more American Holidays.
Apparently, starting an impromptu game of leap frog with somebody bending over to tie their shoe is considered rude. Church is boring.
I`m starting to think all that stuff about Y2K is not going to happen !
"The Ugly Duckling" has a great message. Everything in life will work itself out once you become physically attractive.
I don`t have an inner child. I have an inner old person who wants everyone to shut up.
It isn`t until your kids start talking back that you realize dogs would`ve been a better option.
Nothing is quite so annoying as to have someone go right on talking when you`re interrupting!
You know what’s funny? Lot’s of sh!t. Loosen up already.
If my company really wanted us to move during a fire drill, they`d lose the alarm and just announce that there`s free food by the stairs.
Is there a 5-second Rule for when you drop babies? ...Asking for a friend. JK people!!! LOL ;)
I can eat anything in the house unless it was specifically bought for my wife but the only way to know it`s for her is to eat it. Apparently
Kinda funny how the Mayans said we were all gonna die in 2012, but they all disappeared way before us.
Finding out your ex got fat is like finding 20 bucks in your pocket. Not life changing but definitely puts a smile on your face.
These ‘energy saving` light-bulbs are bullsh!t. They take just as much effort to screw in as the ordinary ones.