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Facebook game requests are like the Jehovah`s witnesses of the internet.
Not sure why my wife is only mad at me, our 4 year old forgot her birthday too.
Just came to the realization that with their ridiculous fees, I`m tipping my ATM more than my bartender.
Ironically, Internet was made to save our time.
Did you hear about the Cannibal that "passed" his Uncle in the Jungle?...............
If I agreed with you we´d both be wrong.
I`m already an idiot, I just need a village.
If a group of midgets performed the YMCA song, it is to be considered that they did it in lowercase?
Confession #156: I always prepare myself before stepping on the escalator
Ummm,, Can we just admit we may have taken this anybody can grow up to be President thing a bit too far.
Join us in calling for a total ban of people. They are extremely dangerous. If you know any people, report them at once to the authorities.
Based on how I startle when toast pops up, I will never look cool walking away from an explosion.
To help reduce cost, this status was typed in china.
My biggest problem is that I believe almost everything I tell myself.
Hangry: (noun) a state of anger caused by lack of food. May evoke negative change in emotional state. Translation -- Feed me or I`ll kill you.