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I have a new rule: No one is allowed to talk to me for a minimum of 24 hours after I wake up.
My life`s paradox: I love sleeping, but I never want to go to bed early.
Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot them?
If one door closes & another door opens, you’re probably in prison.
I enjoy long walks away from responsibility.
Just about the time I started to give a crap, my attitude became constipated......
there`s only 2 things in life you have control in changing that is your attitude and a kids diaper.. which at times both can be the equivalent of the other..
Was late to my first Fight Club last night so missed the intro rules. Still, Fight Club was brilliant and I`d highly recommend Fight Club.
On the 12th day of Christmas my FB gave to me- 12 dudes I`m blocking, 11 friends just watching, 10 corny topics, 9 busted Barbies, 8 friends complaining, 7 stalkers stalking, 6 party invites, fiiiivvvvee drama queeeennss, 4 game requests, 3 photo tags, 2 friends a-pokin and a creep who wont stop Inboxing meee... ;)
Nothing says "I`m unemployed" like wishing for snow on Facebook.
A trail of clothes leading to my bedroom means that I dropped them on the way from the dryer ... That`s all.
I hate getting paid and being broke all in the same day!! :(
Love means never having to say you’re sorry until you`ve thought up a good excuse.
My friend David had his ID stolen yesterday. We just call him Dav now
Weekends will from now on begin on Wednesday because that is when it should truly begin!