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I love tan lines... it`s like God came down and high-lighted all the good parts... ;-)
If it walks like a duck and it looks like a duck, the chances are she`s practising for her next selfie
There is no such thing as a stupid question, but there are such things as stupid people who ask questions.
After watching copious amounts of crime dramas I`ve come to the conclusion that serial killers only target women who wear matching bra and pantie sets. Feeling much safer now.
What did the Japanese man say to the other Japanese man? Something in Japanese,
Fitbits are just like Tamagotchis, except the stupid little creature you have to keep alive is yourself.
If you think about it,, Batman was pretty lazy about naming all his stuff.
For you men who think a woman’s place is in the kitchen, remember… that’s where the knives are kept.
WikiHow suggested 9 Ways to Celebrate Earth Day.... I did all by ?#? SLEEPING?the whole day! How???? I smoked less, used water/power less etc. Wikiwikiwiki!!!!!
I can see exactly 6 years into the future. I have 2020 vision.
That`s disgusting! (unless you`re up for it?)
Telling people your phone is gonna die, But you really just don’t want to text them.
The difference between me & normal people is the normal
Drinking doesn’t make me post better Facebook status updates; it just makes me not care what you think of them…