Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Looking for one night stand! Probably need two! I have a lot of books
Turns out Xenophobia is not `A fear of Warrior Princesses`
Tequila. For those nights you just want to pretend she`s hot.
Roses are red! violets are buckets. This poem makes no sense. Snot.
Just farted in 3 different languages! Thanks, Rosetta Stone!
It`s ok, ghosts, no-one believes in me either.
My door bell is a recording of a shotgun being racked.
If someone doesn`t return your texts, relax and remember they`re probably just busy not liking you.
Finding a date on the internet is so much easier than real life because how are they supposed to know that`s not your Ferrari?
The Gym is like Church. Everybody thinks that by going one hour, one day, they`ll erase what they did during the week.
Pool is my favorite sport because you don`t have to run and there`s beer five feet away.
Is it rude to put *vomits* under someone`s post ?
The parents with the ugliest babies take and post the most pictures.
The problem with coffee is trying to make it when you haven`t had any yet.
If you can`t handle me at my worst I completely understand, because I can`t either.