Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Which wine goes best with more wine?
If cartoons are a reliable guide, the secret to never aging is wearing the same clothes every day.
the real full form of M.B.A....Married But Available
Someone asked me today if ive ever been with two women at the same time. But why would I want to disappoint two women at the same time?
Today I met one of those people on the bus that gets all pissed off when you put your finger in their mouth when they yawn.
You think your wife is crazy now? Try divorcing her
Patience is what I have when there are too many witnesses.
Objects in spandex are larger than they appear
Covers on, too hot. Covers off, too cold. One foot out would prolly be ok, but I don’t wanna be dragged from bed paranormal activity style.
If people winked in real life as much as they do in texts, the world would be a really creepy place.
I don’t trust public opinion polls because they don’t take into consideration the fact that the public is made up of mostly idiots.
Christmas time always make me blue :-(( and then red, then green, then oh wow.. presents...
I like calling the Psychic Hotline and asking them what I`m wearing.
My Tupperware lids and single socks are chilling somewhere laughing at me.
Scariest Moment: Flushing the toilet at someone else’s house, and seeing the water rise…