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If you see someone wearing camouflage, make sure to walk right into them so they know it`s working.
Adam: Eve, you read the terms and conditions before using that Apple product right? Eve: Uh yeah, totally
Finally got my Bon Jovi Sat Nav working... Wooahh we`re half way there.
Slut: desirable woman who has sex with someone other than yourself.
Sanity is so overrated. I mean, it`s a nice place to visit, but I wouldn`t want to live there....
This nude beach would be great!...if I wasn`t the only one participating.
It isn`t until your kids start talking back that you realize dogs would`ve been a better option.
There are people in life you could NEVER get tired of hitting with a shovel!!!
Putting on deoderant and colonge because you haven`t showered in days, is as about as useful as shutting the lid on a toilet after its overflowing.
Liquid sanity: I call it alcohol..!!
I dunno who decided on the spelling of bologna, but it`s obvious he had no idea how letters work.
Don`t get into a relationship with someone unless they love you as much as Kim Kardashian loves Kim Kardashian.
My goal today is to turn actions into thoughts.
If at first you don’t succeed, you shouldn’t diffuse bombs.
Is there really a need for constipation medicines and stool softeners in a world where burritos and tacos exist?