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Just got back from a vacation in Nevada...turns out that money can by you love.
There is something so unique about me, that even I can`t figure it out...
Just saw the book "Marriage for Dummies." ... Shouldn`t there be an "is" in there somewhere?
Happiness, is just a liquor store away.
Nothing says poor life choices like the guy with the half smoked cigarette behind his ear
WARNING: Objects in profile pics are not as pretty as they appear.
Nothing is quite so annoying as to have someone go right on talking when you`re interrupting!
He who laughs last didn´t get it.
Why would you live in a place where the air hurts your face?
Sorry I cancelled at the last minute, but it took me forever to think of an excuse I hadn`t used yet.
I have no super powers. I`m guessing I`m the villain.
My stalker twisted his ankle, so now I have to walk slower for 2-3 weeks.
Dear person reading this, just want you to know that someone cares about you. It`s not me, but I`m sure someone does...
God: Is there anything else you need Adam? Adam: yes I want a Sandwich! God: Ok let`s create eve.
If you love something,, let it go..... That`s EXACTLY what I`ve done with my body....