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In movies, do actors wear costume underwear? Or underwear from home? The whole thing is confusing. I don`t think I can keep watching movies
Coffee...Meet your Maker!
I like to take an empty Krispy Kreme donut box to work and sit in the break room and watch all of the disappointed faces
They should put Prince on the $20 bill and call it $19.99... It`s "The bill formerly known as a twenty."
Started a new exercise routine yesterday. So far I`ve only missed one day.
Sometimes I wish I could officially change "Hump Day" into "Smack-A-Dumb-Bitch-In-The-Face" Day.
I’ve always wanted to climb Mt. Everest…just not more than I don’t want to.
My favorite beer is an open one.
I ordered some bubble wrap online. It arrived in a box surrounded by packing peanuts.
"This isn`t my first rodeo" -Guy at his second rodeo
The tragedy of Scooby-Doo is that whoever kept supplying criminals with such realistic prosthetic masks was never caught.
Arguing with people in the comments section is like crack for me. I don`t do it.
I tried to give a cute waitress my phone number by writing it on the credit card receipt but accidentally tipped her 9 billion dollars.
"Can`t touch this." ... "Can`t touch this." ... "Can`t touch this."--MC Hammer giving a Museum tour
I have decided to follow my dreams.....starting with that one where I am naked at work.