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Kiss me I`m Irish, put a little tongue in it, I`m French too
Contrary to popular belief, it`s actually the fat that makes you look fat. It was never the dress
Unless you fell off the treadmill and smacked your face, nobody wants to hear about your workout.
never judges a book by its cover. I use the paragraph on the back, it tells you what the story is about.
My favorite part of the movie The Notebook is where I turned it off and watched Terminator 2 instead.
Men would be way more excited about cleaning if spray bottles made a laser noise.
Don`t put off for tomorrow what you can do today, because if you enjoy it today you can do it again tomorrow.
I once ran a Half Marathon. Well, I say that because it sounds better than saying I collapsed and almost died halfway through a Full Marathon.
I will be good today... I will be good today... I will be good today... Yeah.... I didn`t believe it either..
If you see me laughing like a crazy person, think nothing of it ..it`s just the voices in my head telling me jokes!
There needs to be more “damn it I missed my exit” exits.
Might wake up early and go running but I also might win the lottery, the odds are about the same
I bought powdered water but I don`t know what to add to it.
Things that don`t kill spiders: 1: furniture polish 2: Febreze 3: butter 4: screaming
I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.