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So many rules; so little time to break them.
The amount of people who confuse "to" and "too" is amazing two me.
To say I wasted today would be a huge insult to the producers of the 3 movies I watched.
The fact that jellyfish have survived for 650 million years despite not having brains is great news for stupid people.
I just ate what I thought was a feta cheese crumble from my salad off my shirt. Turns out it was deodorant. So how`s your day going?
To make a long story short quit right in the middle.
Peanut butter and jelly. That´s what I like in my belly
They say women only use 10% of their anger
Called AA by mistake. Those drunks can`t change a tire for sh*t.
I just got a paper cut opening a box of Pop Tarts. There will be no more fancy breakfasts around here.
I need a partner in wine.
if your looking for love sorry to disappoint you im already in a relationship with fun and freedom. :-)
Ain`t no sunshine when she`s gone..... or sandwiches.... Ain`t no sandwiches either.
Besides being curled up on the bathroom floor convinced I was dying from liver failure for a few hours, last night was fun.
The only good thing about being an alcoholic is that no one ever asks me to drive them anywhere.