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Just saw someone holding a sign that said "Honk 2 impeach Obama" You`d think the process to impeach a president would be more complicated
Never trust anyone who says “Im not supposed to tell anyone but”
I couldn`t find the word `Disappear` in the dictionary. Strange!
Happy President`s day all. Heading out to buy a new mattress.
My friend works at a rubber dog poop factory. He`ll never get rich, but he makes doo.
Attention...my facebook page has been hacked. But everyone seems to like the new guy better, me too actually...so fvck it!
Patience Is When Playing TETRIS And U Let Those Bricks Fall On Their Own Without Speeding Them Down
I am at my most hostage negotiator when I see my 3 year old with a permanent marker without a lid.
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
I just came online to check the weather. That was 12 years ago.
Whoever said "What goes around, comes around", never passed around a bag of Doritos......................
Pee your name in the snow and you`ll quickly understand why they should teach cursive in our schools.
Hello, fire department? Is this Mr. February? Yeah, I`m stuck in a tree. Uh, I mean... meooow.
It`s always the rednecks that know all the inner most conspiracies of the government.
You`re such a slut, the only reason why you wear panties is to keep your ankles warm.