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If you figure me out I want an explanation.
Jimmy is short for James? This is where I think English is stupid. They have the same number of letters. Do they even know what short means?
Have some fun: goto the local bar. Play every Justin Beaber song and leave.
What do you mean I didn’t win, I ate more wet t-shirts than anyone else.
Friendship must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, nudity, inappropriateness, and shenanigans.
It`s tax season. Anyone have some spare kids?
On average I spend $75 a year to watch bananas turn brown.
You`re the kind of friend I text when I`m pooping and need something to do.
Ladies: if you argue with your man naked, you will win every single time.
ever notice that on a phone the word "mom" is 666?
Why does no one ever talk about where a bear pees?
When someone tries to tell me they can`t do something, I`m like "you ever hear of the Power of Grayskull?"
gone fishing ¸.·´¯`·.¸><((((º>
How many days in a row do you have to wear the same clothes until you’re legally a cartoon?
Hoping to get "till death do us part" reduced to a 15 year sentence and time served.