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Not sure if this Adderall is working but I just made a pros and cons list about pros and cons lists.
I hear the Pink Panther song when I sneak down the hall for a midnight snack..
How can I love nature when it did this to my hair?
If you canโ€™t laugh at yourself, call meโ€ฆ Iโ€™ll do it.
A psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dogโ€™s IQ. Hereโ€™s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
The heat index is somewhere between OMG and WTF!
Just watched The Grey. The wolves left half the Mexican .. to spicy??
It is a sad day when you go to all the trouble of getting a Frontal Lobotomy and no one notices.....................
Thereโ€™s actually a thing called โ€œPlay Dates โ€œ in 2018. In 1984 we called that โ€œGoing outside to playโ€
Don`t be sad, laundry. Nobody is doing me either.
I just found a whip, a mask and handcuffs in my momโ€™s bedroom. I canโ€™t believe it.. Sheโ€™s a superhero!
Well if you didn`t want me to fall in love with you, why did you tell me you had nachos?
If Facebook has taught us anything, it`s that a lot of people are not quite ready for a Spelling Bee.
Honking your horn is fun but rolling down your window and screaming โ€œhonkโ€ at people is just way more satisfying.
RIGHT NOW YOU HAVE: 3 fingers behind your phone, your pinky tucked under for support and your scrolling with your thumb! LIKE if Iโ€™m right!!!!