Daily Silly Status

Making an effort in the last of 2014 to cut away distractions so I can spend more time with my iPhone.

You can pretty much text anything as long as you put a happy face emoticon afterwards. You`re a slut :)

If you’re getting dirty looks because your baby is crying loudly on a plane, start crying even louder and everyone will avoid eye contact

Smile

I think sharks eat people just to be on tv.

Nothing is more heartbreaking than unappreciated sarcasm!

"With a stroke of a pen your name can live on forever in a quote!... Unknown,

I think my problem is that I have really fantastic bad ideas…

I read that taking a long, hot bath can help with managing stress. Unfortunately my boss doesn`t approve.

Here`s a fun idea: Before your next party or get together, buy some liver and other cuts of meat. Put them in clear containers and put labels on them with random names ("Clarice", "Richard", etc). Then put them in your refrigerator. For even more fun, put some empty containers beside the fridge with your friends` names on them....

I`m thinking about remodeling my bathroom and thanks to all your selfies I`m getting some great ideas!!.....

Guys be like, "Lets play 21 question." Girl: Ok, what`s your favorite color? Boy: Triangle, so you a virgin?

If we aren`t meant to have late night snacks then why is there a light in the fridge.

Sarcasm is a body`s natural defense against stupid people

I have no idea why they say that counting sheep helps you fall asleep. This farm is freezing and these cows are noisy as hell.