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Now there’s Adderall to perk up, Xanax to calm down, Prozac to feel normal. In my day we drank beer for all three.
Crazy? ... My therapist does say I should quit talking to myself.
Wow! it`s late.. I need to hit the sack........ Then go to bed.
I got pulled over for drunk driving last night. In my defense I didn`t even know I was driving.
You guys remember back before Google when we would just sit around and wonder about sh!t ...?
If one goes to online college, do they have to haze them self?
You should never lie through your teeth. Open your mouth and speak properly.
Why is it called tourist season if we can`t shoot them?
I’m starting to think we as a society may be trying to do too much with the Dorito.
Find someone who is honest, laughs when you make fun of them, and then give each other orgasms.
You know you are desperate for an answer when you look at the second page of Google.
I dont mind going to work, but this eight hour wait to go home is bullsh*t
Next time you ride on a roller coaster, take some spare bolts with you and just as it starts to move, tap the person in front of you and say, "these just fell out of your seat."
Hi I’m an evil ghost with the ability to defy time & space, but I think the best example of my powers will be to slightly close this door.
My friend won a trip to China. He´s out there now... trying to win a trip back.