Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
They don`t make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery.
To all the people who think they don`t need deodorant: What in the world would make you think that?
Exercise... the poor person`s plastic surgery
Radio Shack has stayed in business with a name combining something no one buys anymore and a type of building no one wants to go into.
I swear my cat was an alarm clock in a previous life...
Marriage: It`s sort of like a museum. You have to be quiet and you can`t really touch anything.
DO NOT LIKE THIS… Unless you’re a sexy beast.
Think about the nicest thing anyone`s ever said about you. Not really true, right?
Life was much easier when apples and blackberries were fruits&& not phones
I recently jumped on the back of my psychologist and started counting...1...2...3 and he was so suprised asking me what I was doing and I answered offendedly: "Well you`re the one who said I could always count on you !"
Eleventeen percent of the population makes up words.
I bought a book on eBay called, "How to scam on eBay". That was 2 months ago, and it`s not arrived yet
Moses had the first tablet with cloud connectivity.
I just need someone to feed me and tell me I’m pretty.
I was named after my father. I don`t really like the name "Dad" though.