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Urban Dictionary: Helping white folks figure out if they`re getting insulted or complimented daily.
I spent an hour at Walmart last night.. I can now totally disprove evolution.. O_o
You can’t choose your family, but you can ignore their phone calls.
I watched the deleted scenes from a porno last night. Turns out he ended up fixing the washing machine after all.
The problem with the world is intelligent people are full of doubts, while stupid people are full of confidence.
About to stick a pin in your voodoo doll.... Brace yourself.
For Christmas I just want summer...
They say 1 in 3 people cheat in a relationship. I`m not sure if its my wife or my girlfriend.
Marriage: where all the excitement, laughter and sex is gone but she’s still there.
Any guy can seem cool on a motorcycle. If you really want to know what kind of man you`ve got, watch him walk through a spider web.
I can’t afford Disney World so we go to the biggest hill on my street and my kids wait an hour before I roll them down in my office chair.
My favorite beer is the 15th one.
Imagine if trees gave off WiFi signals, We would be planting so many trees. And we`d probably save the planet too! Too bad they only produce the oxygen we breath :/
You`d think the self checkout lanes would have more mirrors.
Being a parent means often saying your child is shy rather than "he sees how creepy u are, that`s why he doesn`t want to shake your hand".