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That`s weird, all this time I thought the Birds and the Bees was a dance from the 50`s.
Once and for all, I agree to ALL "the terms and conditions" that have or will ever exist!
Grocery stores could save me a lot of time and effort by adding an “All the stuff you can microwave” aisle.
Making a woman laugh is one of the keys to winning her heart, unless she’s laughing at your junk.
I see your arguement contains a lot of swear words, you must really know what you`re talking about
It’s fun to pull someone’s leg… but don’t ever pull their finger.
I’m not shy. I’m just holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.
I woke up with a headache this morning but she went to work.
Look Bruce, just because you call it the "Batcave" doesn`t change the fact that you still live in your parents basement.
Apparently "whiskey and wild women" is not an acceptable answer when asked what your weaknesses are during a job interview.
Tried to plug my charger in the wrong hole. Siri was like STOP " I don`t do that ".
Screw your recommended serving size. You don`t know me.
I`ll give up my thesaurus when you pry it from my frigid, frosty, frozen, cadaverous, lifeless, stiff, defunct extremities.
"Wow! That Lean Cuisine really filled me up!" ... said no one, ever.
I like my coffee like I like my men: caffeinated, made of beans, muscular, tousled hair, you know what, I don`t really know how to do this..