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A new study has found that women find it seven times easier to read men’s facial expressions than men have reading women’s. That’s mostly because we’re not looking at their faces ...
My reaction to winning a billion dollars wouldn`t even come close to my 10 year old`s reaction when I told him that there`s no school today.
Targeted ads are trying to sell me a new mattress nowadays. With how much Google knows about me you`d think they`d cap themselves at something like $5 footlongs or stationary.
I`m not necessarily saying that I am or am not a super hero, but I do occasionally stand with my hands on my hips.
I don`t know if my stomach is growling cuz I`m hungry or if that`s my liver crying cuz it`s the weekend.
Wait, carjacking doesn`t mean masturbating in my vehicle? Then no, I didn`t get arrested for carjacking.
I hate it when I see some old person and then realize that we went to school together
Here`s a list of things I need you to accomplish without any resources to do them with. -management
When I was a kid, my parents told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, this is called "Identity Theft".
If owls are so smart, how come they don`t say "Whom"?
Unplug the copier at work & put a sign on it that says “now voice activated!” Sit back & watch the magic unfold.
Call me old school, but cigarettes should not have USB ports
I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with “Guess” on it…so I said “Implants?”
Never laugh at your wife`s choices. You are one of them :)
I used to be poor. Then I bought a dictionary, and now I`m impecunious.