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If I don`t `like` your post it`s because I don`t care...
If anyone tells you that you drink to much on the weekends. Stop talking to them...you don`t need that kind of negativity in your life
"You`re right I`m sorry. You`re right I`m sorry. You`re right I`m sorry. You`re right I`m sorry" - me practicing for a successful relationship.
If you think I hate you ... I probably do.
I love when bill collectors ask if you can borrow the money...uh I did that before and I think we both know how that turned out.
i hope your life is as long and useful as this roll of toilet paper!!!
My New Years resolution is to be more assertive if that`s okay with you guys?
Scratch and Sniff Here [____] …Smells like glass, doesn’t it
If rolling your eyes burned calories, Facebook would be my gym.
If my house is clean, it means that Facebook is not working.
I just changed my WiFi password to "blowmefirst." I can`t wait for someone to ask me for it!
Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from taking a nap.
My last request: At my funeral, someone come up at the end and padlock my coffin shut, just to freak everyone out.
I`m convinced girls only want one thing from guys... all of our hoodies. -Bfanch
Crowded elevators smell different to midgets!