Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
It only takes a few seconds to show someone how you feel about them......the police call it indecent exposure but whatever.
I made a bucket list for when I kick the bucket. Number one: Wear shoes! Ever tried kicking a metal bucket without shoes? Hurt like hell.
The best revenge is happiness, because nothing drives people more crazy then seeing someone actually having a good life.
Just seen a sign reading "PAY ATTENTION WHILE WALKING your Facebook status update can wait". While on Facebook on my phone. While walking...
What idiot named them jet skis instead of boatercycles?
It’s a humbling moment when you realize your dog or cat has actually trained you to do something.
AOL has been hacked. Users have also been asked to check their Atari settings for possible compromise.
Sometimes I feel that I need someone special to complete me, but then I have a pizza and I`m like, "Nope. I`m good."
My dad says that if I don`t stop typing so loudly, he`s gonna slam my face into the fidbdiUHy6hivIifHfGK
I exercised once, but found I was allergic to it. My skin flushed and my heart raced. I got sweaty and short of breath. Very dangerous.
I found out last night that the only thing worse than waking up 3 times to pee is sleeping right through it.
I wish I could smack the stupid out of people. And if you think this status is about you ... Smack yourself for me!
How old do I have to be when I can start pulling in front of cars without looking?
Suddenly my prison fantasy football league just got real.
I got in touch with my inner child and the little sh!t hung up on me.