Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
"Love is all we need."-Said a wise man 40 years ago. He obviously has never had a computer
If someone is jogging at 7am on a Sunday - it`s because they`ve just killed someone right?
The average person farts 14 times a day. Finally, I`m above average at something!
You have a point. It`s just not very sharp
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
According to these court documents, the way to a woman`s heart isn`t through her bedroom window.
Comcast is doing home security now so if your house is being robbed they will get the police there on Tuesday between the hours of 8 & 12.
buying an old Mercedes Benz so that people may think you have been rich all along
My life may be a mess but at least I didn`t make a harlem shake video.
Screaming out "BOOM PREGNANT!" during sex is never as funny as you think it will be.
To do list- (1). Go to pet store. (2). Buy bird seeds. (3). Ask how long it will take for the birds to grow. (4). Wait for the reaction.
YouTube is so addicting, I click on a music video and next thing you know I`m watching how to make ice cream.
people say that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, but it`s the only way I can talk to you.
A woman’s anger is like a check engine light; there’s no pleasant way to determine what caused it, so just ignore it and hope it goes away.
Every time I get an eyelash in my eye, I`m reminded of how quickly I would die in the wild.