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Urban Dictionary: Helping white folks figure out if they`re getting insulted or complimented daily.
Mazda’s marketing slogan is “We Build Mazdas.” They decided on it after rejecting others like: “Mazdas Are Cars” and “Buy Mazdas With Money”
...and this right here son is called pornography, and it`s why they invented the internet.
The recipe said “Set the oven to 180 degrees,” so I did, but now I can’t open it because the door faces the wall.
Is it true that the older you get the crazier you become? Or is that just me?
Actually baby, diamonds are a girls best friend, so technically I slept with your second best friend
The joy of finding out that your boss is going on a holiday is way greater than you yourself going on one
I found out why I`m still single. Apparently, you have to go outside and let people see you.
If it looks like a pig and walks like a pig, do me a favor & tell my ex girlfriend I said hello.
3 wishes for when I find a genie: 1. The more I eat the skinnier I get 2. One kid grows up to be a pharmacist 3. Other kid owns a winery
Shoot for the moon, and even if you miss, you and your motivational crap is far away
Why do people say "Tuna Fish sandwich?" That`s like saying "Chicken Bird sandwich."
I would be a great procrastinator ... if I could ever get around to it.
I may be stupid but im also dumb! :D
Never compliment a lady on her mustache no matter how magnificent it is