Daily Silly Status

That`s not chapstick in my front pocket.

Who cares about throwing stones? How do people in glass houses hide when somebody knocks on the door?

New documentary movie about white trash ... I only saw the trailer...

I should be able to take a sick day if I am sick of the people I work with.

Ya know once the toothpaste is out of the tube, it´s hard to get it back in.

I recently jumped on the back of my psychologist and started counting...1...2...3 and he was so suprised asking me what I was doing and I answered offendedly: "Well you`re the one who said I could always count on you !"

Home is where a man hangs his hat. Unless that man is wearing a sun visor. Then he probably dosent have a home or friends..

I went outside once. The graphics were amazing but the gameplay and storyline were TERRIBLE.

I don`t think I can call myself an adult until I can accept the fact that "dry clean only" is not a dare.

am a bomb technician...anytime you see me running. Try keep it up

Just because I`m nodding my head at appropriate times while you`re talking doesn`t mean I give a sh!t about what you`re saying..

You don’t have to be drunk to love me, but it helps

This morning I surveyed 100 women and asked them what shampoo they used when showering. 98 of them said, "How did you get in here?"

Movie comes on while im in bed: ugh ive seen this a million times. Movie comes on before I have to get ready for work: oh hell yea a classic

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.