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Of course it`s you. If it was me I wouldn`t even bring it up.
Omg!! got 6 numbers on the Lotto.. and the stupid machine didn´t pick any of them
My wife asked me if I knew her favorite flower was. Apparently "Gold Medal All Purpose" was not the correct response
Patience Is When Playing TETRIS And U Let Those Bricks Fall On Their Own Without Speeding Them Down
Ugly is such an ugly word. If I must describe an ugly person I´d prefer to use the term "handsomely-challenged"
i dont like ling distance relationships so i move the fridge to my room
The older I get the more use I have for the phrase "bite me."
You say illegal, I say added to my bucket list.
I almost talked my way out of a ticket today by telling a female cop she was very attractive, but things went sour when I said "and that`s not just the booze talking either".
I cant wait to show everyone at work my new cough
Ever since I installed AdBlock, all the single ladies in my area seemed to have lost interest.
If we`re all expected to have sex with our Valentine on Valentine`s Day, I`m truly dreading Presidents` Day.
If Reincarnation ends up being real... Those People who got "YOLO" tattoos are going to look... Pretty Silly
I got rid of all the bad influence people in my life and now I`m bored.
Here is a thought for all you mind readers out there…