Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I love finding money in my clothes. It`s like a gift to me... from me. :)
Please don`t wear skinny jeans if you don`t have skinny genes.
“I promise”, “I am sorry”, and “I love you” all have eight letters, but then again, so does “bullshit”.
You see I, I´ve raise a toast to all of us. Who are breakin´ our backs everyday. If wantin´ the good life is such a crime. Lord, then put me away, yeah, here´s to you
I`ve been told that I can be condescending... that means that I tend to talk down to people.
People say that 60 is the new 40. The cop who pulled me over didn`t agree.
That awkward moment when the automatic flushing toilet goes off when you`re still sitting down.
Thanks for calling me to tell me you just sent that email
3 words, 8 letters, easy to say, hard to prove... ..."I`m a zebra."
Since it is the day to give thanks, I would like to say once again...you`re welcome.
See above or below for better statuses.
I like to jump onto people`s backs as an unexpected piggy back. but sometimes I get carried away
I`m a very modest person, mostly because I`m awesome.
Not one person has been eaten by sharks yet this week. Probably the worst Shark Week ever.
Dear Fox news,I have yet to see any news about foxes. Sincerely, disappointed viewer.