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Do you think they still give out chips in Gambler`s Anonymous?
So if one was to type ‘idiot’ into Google, would your picture come up?
Insomnia is very common. Try not to lose any sleep over it.
There`s nothing as wonderful as waking up in the morning next to a gorgeous smiling face. So I keep a mirror next to my bed.
Don`t ever forget.. I`m always here. A l w a y s. Scrolling. Judging. Judging. Scrolling. That`s right. I see everything.
I hide my vodka in orange juice
Another World`s Oldest Man has died. This is beginning to look suspicious.
New word of the day: Stupidiot!!
I`ve been hitting "remind me later" for about the last 4 years on Adobe.
Me: But where do you see this relationship in five years? Her: Sir! For the last time, do you want extra cheese or not?
At times I wish I had a clone, but then I realize, I could never live with that a$$hole.
I dont run from my problems, I chase them ... with alcohol
It`s not you, it`s me. I can`t stand you.
She caught my iphone before it hit the ground... She`s definitely my screensaver
I know you’re supposed to have 3 balanced meals a day, but how many can I have at night?