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One trenta cheeseburger please.
People who don`t know what they want should not use the drive thru!
LOOK A UFO! Quick, grab the worst camera money can buy.
Can we just stop with the pre-sliced cheese? Is anyone so busy that they donβt have time to cut the cheese?
When I think of you I touch myself ... On my temples ... You give me a migraine.
Well, it`s about that time of the day when I stop hitting the snooze button, wipe away the drool, open the blinds, and head on home from work.
Your things are terrific.
Calling all men...Eboli can live up to two months in semen..YES! You better wash your socks.
Zoning out is your brainβs way of saying βYou look bored. Let me take you to a better place.β
you know hes a keeper when you know his facebook login and password!
I have company coming, does a spork go on the right or left side?
I`m sorry. Putting up with your sh!t isn`t on my To-Do list today.
3 bottles of bleach: $15.00. One rope, 3 rolls of duct tape, and a shovel: $35.00. 3 boxes of trash bags: $10.00. The look on the cashier`s face: Priceless!:D
This is my leftover status from Thanksgiving.
Why does the sound of the recliner opening always remind my wife the trash needs to be taken out?