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The worst time to need to sneeze is when you’re driving. The worst time to need to pee it when you’re driving and need to sneeze.
When you write misspelled backwards it`s misspelled.
I screamed a Brazilian times during that waxing.
Things I didn`t learn in high school... how to pay bills buy a house apply for college but thank goodness I can graph a polynomial function.
People with multiple personalities should donate one of them to people who don’t have one.
If you stop at a yellow light I`m going to assume you have something illegal in your car.
Remember if you ask me to put sun lotion on your back, I am definitely drawing something dirty while I`m back there.
If you want to set up a company and run it then that`s your business.
I can eat anything in the house unless it was specifically bought for my wife but the only way to know it`s for her is to eat it. Apparently
they say winning doesnt matter then why they had kept scores
If you want a successful relationship, find someone who likes the same thermostat setting you do.
They call them heated seats because rear defroster was already taken
I just want to point out that I am an Amazon Prime member so it`s about time you guys started treating me with a little respect.
Best part of living alone...clothing optional ;)
There are 10 types of people in the world, Those that understand binary, and those who don`t.