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With the promise of Free Drinks or Food, I’m willing to go pretty much anywhere.
Sanity is so overrated. I mean, it`s a nice place to visit, but I wouldn`t want to live there....
50% of people believe s@x is "the connecting of two people`s souls through two people`s bodies, as one." The other 50% are guys
Hate is too powerful an emotion to waste on somebody you don`t even like.
There could be a ghost aggressively breakdancing next to you right now, and you`d have no Idea...
Married people always ask when you’re getting married like they get points for recruiting to their club of misery.
Old enough to know better, young enough to take a dare...
My job description does not include farting on everyone else`s office chairs but I still do it because INITIATIVE.
When a pizza guy comes to my door, I like to answer wearing the same uniform as him and holding a pizza.....and then insist that he called me
All I’m saying is you don’t see many neck tattoos on Jeopardy.
Another funny thing about this status is when you finally realize that it talks about nothing? its all ready too late to stop reading. lol
For some reason, I`m an extremely secretive person. Don`t ask me why!
Trying to be less negative but it`ll never work.
So far I’ve spent most of 2014 flipping off the weather channel.
After watching "Breaking Bad" and the VMAs in the same night, I think I`d rather my kid be a meth dealer than a musician.