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Wishing you a fabulous 2014 that is full of great achievements and experiences. A meaningful chapter waiting to be written HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Stairs are like rock climbing after a bottle of vodka.
I had four E`s and LSD last night. Such an awful start to a game of scrabble!!
I`m pretty sure whoever coined the phrase " rise and shine", doesn`t do it anymore.
Sometimes after a nap, I like to take another nap.
The problem with kleptomaniacs is that they take things so literally.
My new years resolution was to lose 30 lbs by the end of summer... I`ve only got 40 lbs to go.
Facebook is proof that people should not be allowed to name themselves.
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it.
The most expensive part of having kids is all the booze I drink.
Don´t call me crazy. I much prefer the term "mentally hilarious"
I keep my landline active because I know sooner or later Trinity or Morpheus will contact me.
I`m one step away from being rich, all I need now is money.
I finally had the talk with my kids. I told them that in the wild animals eat their young so they better get their sh!t together.
I`m sleeping in tell Friday so ... Happy Tuesday.