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Can`t wait to be full of Christmas beer! I mean cheer. No, I definitely mean beer.
I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.
Sorry but if these walls could talk I`m pretty sure they`d talk about wall things and not whatever scandal you`re blowing out of proportion.
Imagine how bad it would be if everyone could hear what you were thinking.
He was like, `We`re all slowly dying` So I was like, `WRONG` and I threw him in front of a moving bus.
How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb?
When I was a kid and was going to "get it" that was bad. Now I`m an adult and I`m going to "get it" :)
Please don`t post that political joke you just came up with. . . it really wasn`t that funny to begin with. Thanks for understanding. -the rest of us
Sometimes its better to eliminate the problem rather than trying to solve it.
When I see ads on TV with smiling, happy housewives using a new cleaning product, the only thing I want to buy are the meds they must be on.
It only takes a second to show someone how you feel. The police call it “Indecent Exposure” but whatever.
GAL: Would you keep me in your heart forever? BOY: Nop! GAL: (sadly)...why? BOY: Because then you`ll occupy only one part of me...but i`ll keep you in my heart, mind & let you complete me.
Its better to have loved and lost, then stay with that psyco for one more sec
I was going to buy my first pair of Jordans.. Until I saw the price.. So I decided to make a car payment instead!
Would buy you a drink but I would be jealous of the glass.