Daily Silly Status

Monica & Chandler’s twins would be 9 this year, Pheobe’s triplets 14, Ben 18, and Emma 11. Let’s just take a moment to let that sink in.

If someday we all go to prison for downloading Movies and TV shows, I just hope they split us up by genre.

Not sure why my wife is only mad at me, our 4 year old forgot her birthday too.

If it rains on a dream catcher, does that make it a wet dream catcher?

I either get what I want or I change my mind!

Wish I turned into a wolf every month instead of getting my period

The guest of honour was a bit subdued. The Keyboardist was playing too softly for my liking. But it was a good turnout, lots of food and laughter. But break out into one choreographed `Thriller` dance routine and the crowd goes all apesh!t and tosses you out of the funeral home.

Opening the Tupperware cupboard at home should be regarded as an extreme sport.

My kids are giving all the people on this airplane a hard lesson in birth control right now.

I’m alone in my car. Counting it as a vacation.

Head and Shoulders should make a body wash called Everything Else

I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on.

That prince in Sleeping Beauty doesn`t get enough credit for kissing someone who hadn`t brushed her teeth in forever.

I`m one of the nicest a$$holes you could ever hope to meet.

I`m broker than the Tooth Fairy in a house full of Meth addicts.