Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Who needs a social life when you have Netflix and a fridge full of food?
People like you remind me how lucky I am that my cell phone provider has a block option! Just sayin.
How the hell can Dora call herself an explorer if she only goes to places already on the map?
Well it`s about time I get in line for that Star Wars movie
I went to buy condoms and the cashier just said "yeah right" and put em back on the shelf
I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on your bus do not go round & round.
If my house is clean, it means that Facebook is not working.
Shout out to hotel maids changing sheets on February 15th.
Nobody tell my husband that "year round periods" aren`t a thing.
If you are offended by the words "In God We Trust" on your money, then send it to me. I don`t mind it at all.
Sometimes I feel happy, but then the Oreos run out.
Sometimes I wish my dog could talk…then I remember all the things he has seen me do when I’m alone.
I will vote for Donald Trump just to hear him tell Obama he`s fired!!
We got an extra day this year. Why did it have to be a Monday?
The Titanic is a great lesson of why just the tip can get you in a lot of trouble.